We all experience misfortune, hardship and setbacks. Adversity is part of life, and overcoming it is crucial to our physical and mental wellness. Overcoming adversity is really about turning seemingly negatives events into positive experiences. Consider some of these tools, tips and habits to help you overcome adversity.
See it as an opportunity. This is easier said than done. It can be tough to see losing your house in a natural or financial disaster as an opportunity. It can be difficult to see the opportunity in getting fired from your job or flunking out of college or dealing with an unexpected divorce or illness. To see it as an opportunity you must ask yourself this question, "What is the benefit of this setback?" Keep asking this question until you find the answer. If you don't perceive it as an opportunity you will be defeated by it. Napoleon Hill said, "Every adversity carries within in it the seed of an equal or greater benefit."
Make a resolve to rise up and conquer it. Friedrich Nietzsche proclaimed, "That which does not destroy me makes me stronger." Metaphorically, you have to put on your battle gear or put on your war paint or put on your game face. You've got to roll up your sleeves and get to work. Sitting around pouting will only make things worse. You've got to muster up the time, the energy, and the commitment to make the situation work in your favor.
Seek advice from a professional. This can usually quicken the pace of overcoming adversity as opposed to the usual trial and error approach. You might need to find a tutor, a marriage or family counselor or an attorney or physical therapist or medical doctor. Talk with someone who has experience in dealing with your current predicament.
Recreate to change your focus. Get out and do something you enjoy. Go for a hike. Listen to your favorite music. Whatever. Go on a mini or full vacation, if possible. Being consumed every minute of your life by your current adversity can be disastrous. Changing your focus also allows you to step back to get a clearer perspective.
Set new goals in writing. If you lost your job, your house, your marriage, your health, your family, and the list goes on it is time to set new goals! Grab pen and paper or run your fingers along a keyboard. Script your short-term goals. Get clear about your 30-, 60- or 90-day, perhaps one-year goals. A short-term goal allows you to experience progress, and fosters feelings of accomplishment.
Journal lessons learned. Chinese proverb states, "The palest ink is better than the best memory." Often we forget about the many successes and lessons we learn in life. Journaling your life experience offers insightful references that can support a new solution to a current woe. Keeping a journal also reminds us of previous setbacks we have encountered and conquered. Journaling can also be cathartic. Get it out of your head by putting it in writing.
Embrace your blessings. We have so many things to be grateful for. Sometimes we are so engrossed in our setback that we forget to count our blessings. Write down a few things you are grateful for. The relaxing benefits of this exercise will be felt immediately.
Direct your energy to find a solution. Getting upset, yelling and screaming, or moaning and groaning, does little or no good. Too frequently people burn up all their energy complaining. Despite current difficulties it's in our best interest to be solution-focused. Let's face it, it's easy to find fault, blame someone else or dwell on a failure until it destroys us. The path less traveled is to immediately find a solution.
Take it one step at a time. Hiking the tallest mountain is accomplished one step at a time. If you are feeling overwhelmed, focus on putting one foot in front of the other. Make a list of small action items. If you are feeling stuck, get some help. You can hire a temporary worker, find a volunteer, or ask your friends and family. The point is to keep forward moving momentum, no matter how small the step.
Avoid feeling sorry for yourself. Helen Keller wrote, "Self-pity is our worst enemy and if we yield to it we can never do anything wise in this world." If you're engaging in a "poor me" attitude find a way to break your pattern. Read scripture, talk it out with a friend, listen to a motivational program, review your gratitude list, consult a professional, watch a funny movie or help someone else in need.
Engage in physical exercise. Exercise is powerful medicine. If you've never begun an exercise program or fallen off your fitness schedule, now is the time to make it a priority. Exercise provides you with the energy and stamina to keep moving forward. It busts stress and releases brain chemicals that make you feel confident and optimistic. Choose from yoga, running, swimming, power walking, lifting weights, basketball, volleyball, and racquetball, whatever suits you. Perform your exercise at least three days a week.
Take accountability. It is up to you to see that you overcome adversity. No one can do this for you. Blaming someone else or circumstances holds you back. This does not mean you have to carry the world on your shoulders. It does mean, though, that you have to own your part of your current setback. This is a hard pill to swallow since it is much easier to assign blame to other people or circumstances. You are responsible for your own triumph. It is not the responsibility of government; it is not up to your parents, your significant other, your friends, your boss, society, etc.
Misfortunes, tribulations, calamity and distress are going to occur. The question is: What are you going to do about it? Pick up a few of these practical tools the next time adversity is staring you in the face.
Best of success to you!
Jeffrey Benjamin is the co-author of Real Life Habits for Success the founder of Breakthrough Training in Reno and the host of Breakthrough Radio every Sunday at 9:30 a.m. on 99.1 FM. Contact him through www.breakthroughtraining.com.
